{"product_id":"i-dont-want-to-adult-8oz-soy-candle","title":"I Don't Want to Adult Soy Candle — 8oz Funny Hand-Poured Candle | Valor \u0026 Wicks","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eAdulting is hard. This candle gets it. \"I Don't Want to Adult\" is the perfectly relatable candle for the work-from-home crowd, the perpetually burnt-out, and everyone who's ever wanted to cancel all their plans and just light a candle instead.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eBeyond the laugh, this is a genuinely exceptional 8oz hand-poured soy candle with a cozy, comforting fragrance that makes staying in feel like the best decision you've made all day. Clean-burning natural soy wax, lead-free wick, and phthalate-free fragrance oil — everything you need to not adult in style.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDetails:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul class=\"[li_\u0026amp;]:mb-0 [li_\u0026amp;]:mt-1 [li_\u0026amp;]:gap-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ul]:pb-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ol]:pb-1 list-disc flex flex-col gap-1 pl-8 mb-3\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eSize: 8oz\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eWax: 100% natural soy wax\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eWick: Lead-free cotton\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eScent: Cozy, comforting blend (see listing for current scent notes)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eBurn time: Approx. 40–50 hours\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003ePhthalate-free fragrance\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eFun, relatable label art — ships ready to gift\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003ePerfect for the millennial who has everything, the friend who needs a laugh, or yourself. No judgment.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Valor \u0026 Wicks Candles ","offers":[{"title":"Baked Apple Pie","offer_id":53193423192378,"sku":null,"price":14.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cinnamon Vanilla","offer_id":53193423225146,"sku":null,"price":14.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blueberry Cheesecake","offer_id":53193423257914,"sku":null,"price":14.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0990\/2545\/3370\/files\/work-from-home-lifestyle-candle.png?v=1774041585","url":"https:\/\/valorwickscandles.com\/products\/i-dont-want-to-adult-8oz-soy-candle","provider":"Valor \u0026 Wicks Candles ","version":"1.0","type":"link"}